Side Chick Music

Soo lets talk real quick. It was brought to my attention that SZA is supposedly “side chick music.”  Now if you really listen to SZA you would know what she is all about. But most people refer to her based off of her song “The Weekend” Where she says

“You say you got a girl
How you want me?
How you want me when you got a girl”

“My man is my man is your man
Heard that’s her man
Tuesday and Wednesday, Thursday and Friday
I just keep him satisfied through the weekend”

And yeah on the outside looking in it sound exactly like that. But take it from this stand point. What if you were dealing with a man who is supposedly in love with two or more woman? each woman knows about each other and are okay with what is going on with him. Does that make her a side chick? who is really the main chick? But really is it just her saying shit he is for everybody!?

SZA isn’t this “Hey everybody lets just play these nigga how the play us!” She is about empowerment. Her songs are about the things she has and is going through. I bring this topic up because of her new music video Supermodel. The video begin with her doing what all woman do looking in the mirror pick at ourselves, with her “man” in the back laugh at her. These kids come and make her feel beautiful. As she is walking the road in a forest she is straight WORKING and SLAYING!!!! But while walking she see’s her man laughing at her again.

“I could be your supermodel
If you believe
If you see it in me
See it in me
See it in me

I don’t see myself
Why I can’t stay alone just by myself
Wish I was comfortable just with myself
But I need you”

That is the words of a woman that constantly fight with her self esteem something we all have trouble with. Its the same with the song Drew Barrymore

“I get so lonely, I forget what I’m worth
We get so lonely, we pretend that this works
I’m so ashamed of myself think I need therapy-y-y-y
I’m sorry I’m not more attractive
I’m sorry I’m not more ladylike
I’m sorry I don’t shave my legs at night
I’m sorry I’m not your baby mama
I’m sorry you got karma comin’ to you
Collect and soak in it right”

Here’s something from Broken Clocks

“All I got is these broken clocks
I ain’t got no time
Just burning daylight
Still up still up
Its still love its
Still love still love still loving still love
Nothing but love for you
Nothing but love
Nothing but love”

In the end of all of this SZA is a real one. She sings about being in these crazy stages of our lives in these crazy ass 20’s. Where you would think we would be past self esteem issues, bad relationships, and toxic love. But it life and we gotta keep pushing through. But next time you listen to supposedly “side chick music” listen to the story and not just the chicks who live their lives off of being a side chick. And just saying Shirley Murdock – As We Lay is side chick music lol but its still my jam! Tell me what you think about SZA -CTRL!

peace, love, and positivity

What I love and Why I love it

So I’m going to give you a quick story on why I love to do makeup and how I began this journey with it.

When I was about 15, I would say that was when I first notice that I was interested in makeup. I loved the colors of the eye shadows my mother had, How the black eyeliner would make my eyes pop. (I have light brown eyes.) It just use to be simply things like a little eyeliner here and there. Now of course I wasn’t the greatest at applying it but it was a start.

 

 

 

 

Now my senior prom is when I really got into makeup, I went to MAC to get it done as usually but this time the girl used so many colors and products I was so interested. asking question; What is this for? How do you use this?

 

 

 

Now I go off to college and start experimenting. But still not knowing nothing about contouring and highlighting or the importance of EYEBROWS!! But at least my base was even. lol

 

 

 

I leave college and just kind of do my own thing for awhile got to a relationship and really rarely wore makeup but here are a few pictures. Mind you still a working progress.

And then in 2014 I had my sons, I became a stay at home mom. I didn’t really do too much at home beside take care of my son’s and go to school. So  I watched YouTube makeup tutorials all day. How to contour and highlight, how to correctly do you eyebrow. HIGHLIGHTERS!!!! Eyeliner, Eye shadow blending. I had found my life goal. Once I started practicing, people would compliment me on my makeup all the time. How do I do this or that? Who does my makeup? Will I do their’s? I had truly found what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

Now I have never loved doing anything as much as I love doing my makeup and others too. It is my everything. I wonder for years what I wanted to do with my life. I have changed my major so many times from psychology, to early education, to IT, to now finally Business. I want to build myself a brand and create something I can give to my children when they come of age. I learned that within the last year that if you don’t follow your dreams and goals that what are you really doing?

 

Live Healthy ❤

 

 

recognize.

 

A lot of times people think that their accomplishments have to go recognize. But they really don’t. I always tell people that the things I do and the reason I work so hard for the things I want in life is because I do it for myself, not for my kids, not for my family, not for my friends. I do what I want or need to give me the sense of accomplishment. I don’t do it so someone can give me a pat on the back. So just because you don’t see me moving doesn’t mean things aren’t in motion.

My Goals For 2017

I know its March already but I didn’t want to write about my goals and until the where in full effect. I told myself that 2017 isn’t my so called “year.” But it is a chance  to make major changes in my life. So here are all my goals for the 2017 year and I have broken them down by Finances, Work, Business,Travel, and Self.

Finances  

So if you know me you know that I’m terrible with money. And its in the sense that I will pay all my bills, but any left over money is spending money. I get paid bi-weekly which means by Monday the following week, I’m broke. I know right sad. So I told myself that I’m going to create a real budget, put about 50 dollars in my saving every check as well as 25 dollars in both my sons account every check as well. I don’t think about the impossible and then the impossible happens. So for the month of January was a trial run and by February it was in full effect, Mind you before I got my taxes.

Work 

I have one major problems at work. Taking off too much and not having enough leave (Sometimes because of my son’s and other times because I just didn’t feel like coming). And something else I want to do is get my next promotion being that I have been at my job for 2 years I have received 3 raises and 2 promotions. But I know I can get more. But that part is easy, which is come to work and do my work. But the leave situation I have a solution which is that I change my schedule to what is called 4/10. This means that I work 4 days a week, 10 hours days and I’m off on a day I choose. I had this schedule before and it worked for me because If I had a doctors appointment or just didn’t feel like coming to work I would either schedule all my appointment on my day off, and also remind myself that I was going to be off so I didn’t call off too much and I really started to build up leave.

Business

This going to be kind of short, basically I want to start my own business, I’m currently a makeup artist on this side. Its my little side hustle. And I’m great at it. But I don’t want to be a makeup artist for the rest of my life, when I dream, I dream BIG. I want to own my own cosmetic company. And basically I go to school for business administration so I can get the idea of running a business. So my goal for this year is to write my business plan as well as be testing product by the end of this year.

Travel

The last 3 years I haven’t been out the state I live in. So this year I decided I’m traveling more. I’m not going to let anyone tell me where I can and can’t go. So this year is going to be places I want to go in the US and next year is places I want to go out of the country. But just a short list of where I will be going this year; Los Angeles, CA, Memphis, TN, Seattle, WA, Chicago, IL, Lake of the Ozarks, MO, New York City, NY and maybe New Orleans, LA. Now some of these I have already been to, but I enjoy the environment.

Self

Now this one is kind major for me. I have been changing my life everyday. But after last year 2 weeks before Christmas, my kids father and I got into a fight and broke up. And it made me reevaluate some things. Like why do I keep letting him in? Why can’t we work together in a relationship but be the greatest of friends? Can I really move on and find someone better? there was a million questions that ran through my mind. But one thing I realized and I got it from a song

Kehlani – Advice.

“I almost lost my mind, yeah
I left myself behind, yeah
I almost crashed and fell right from the sky
I took a chance on this, yeah
I took too big a risk, yeah
And now I’m left with pain to get me high”

It was time for me to take my own advice, i always tell people know your worth. Yes relationship are going to have there up’s and down’s, and stupid petty arguments but what we have to remember is “Is this argument going to be what breaks us or makes us?” Its just seemed like every arguments broke us even more down. So when he left, I let it go. And I grew from it. But now I’m in a space where I just want to focus on getting back in shape and continue my healthy life style, and continuing to grow in the person I am becoming. I notice that when you focus on yourself and your grind, people tend to gravitate towards you. So as for now its just about me and my kids and what makes us happy.